Neckware and Semiotics for the Advanced Beginner
by Tomasina
Summary: Leonard comes home early to unexpected 'note' on the door. He knows what it means, except he really doesn't. Does he?
1. Chapter 1

**I'll let you know at the end exactly when this story takes place, but for now have fun with Leonard and figure out what's going on on your lonesome. IC and IAW canon, as always. **

**Neckware and Semiotics for the Advanced Beginner: Chapter One**

Leonard stared dumbfounded at the tie on his apartment door. It was certainly Sheldon's tie; He recognized the pattern vividly from the night Sheldon dropped his pants after imbibing just a bit too much liquid courage. And Sheldon was the only other person who lived there...

Unless you counted Penny. And you could, since once they'd started sleeping together again last month, the two of them went back and forth so much you could consider the whole floor a three bedroom suite. But he couldn't figure out what kind of reason she would have for hanging it there either. While they did engage in a little hanky-panky in the living room… or the kitchen… from time to time, it was certainly never preplanned. Anyway he know for a fact she was working a bar shift at the Cheesecake Factory right now, and although Leonard had originally planned on browsing used video games with the other guys that afternoon, he'd ducked out when Howard and Stuart got into it again over who should go with Raj to The Rocky Horror Picture Show next week.

Sheldon _was_ supposed to be home. But the tie still made no more sense than it had five minutes ago when he froze in the hallway with his hand two inches from the doorknob. It wasn't the first time he'd seen something like this. His roommate in college had hung one on their door several times, often forgetting to take it off and finding it hilarious to come out in the morning and find Leonard asleep in the hallway. He'd even hung one on his bedroom door in this very apartment once. He didn't know at the time if Sheldon would even know what it meant, and he was half afraid he would open the door to ask, but he was even more certain if he didn't take the chance there would just be a repeat of that awful 'date' he'd had with Joyce Kim. Sheldon ended up calling him anyway to tell him he knew Leslie was in there and the message was received, but looking at this tie on this door at this moment, Leonard's brain flat out refused to call on Occam's Razor to jump to the most likely conclusion.

Did Sheldon _really _know what it meant?


	2. Chapter 2

**I know these are short and not my best work, but this is mostly about me getting back into the habit and trying to renew my Reviews addiction to keep me going, so please be patient with me.**

**Chapter 2**

Ten minutes had passed now, and Leonard was still standing in the hallway like a statue with his brow furrowed in concentration. Or maybe it was the effort _not_ to concentrate. He wasn't sure. He did know that his bladder was beginning to call for attention and he was beginning to feel the tingle that would signal a migraine by the evening. He could knock. But one did not do that when a tie was hanging on the door. And he _lived_ there for crying out loud! He briefly thought about going next door to use the toilet and sit down to think for a while, but the key to Penny's was in the dish on the other side of the door. Although things were going well, it seemed presumptuous to carry it permanently on his key ring, and Sheldon already bitched periodically about how Leonard looked like a warden with as many keys as he carried now. The problem of getting to it should not have been an issue.

A few people had passed through the stairwell as Leonard stood there. No one said anything. The obvious fact that there was a problem was enough for his fellow residents not to want risk getting involved without being asked. Leonard faintly registered the sound of footsteps increasing in speed as they passed him by, but took no notice of them consciously until one did deliberately call for his attention.

"Hey, Leonard. What are you doing here?" Leonard started and turned towards the unexpected voice at his elbos. Of all the people it could have been, Wil Wheaton was definitely the last he'd have expected.

"Me? I live here."

"Doesn't look like it," Wil said skeptically. "Why are you just standing out here?"

"I… What are you doing here?"

"It's a little embarrassing actually, but Sheldon asked me to…" then Wil noticed the tie and trailed off. They looked at eachother awkwardly for a moment, but just as Wil opened his mouth to continue, the door was suddenly opened from within.

"I knew I heard you! Wil, get in here! You're late and Amy's been ready for…" Sheldon stopped as he registered Leonard's presence and shut the door behind him quickly, although Leonard was still too confused (frightened?) to have taken the opportunity to look past him. Now Sheldon was scowling at Leonard as if he were an unwelcome guest instead of his best friend-slash-roommate, and his next words confirmed the impression. "What are _you_ doing here?"


End file.
